Update

Proof I have 3 kids....I blogged and tracked everything with Tommi, a little less with Miley, and hardly anything with Waylon. Well ok that is not true...I keep track of important things but far less than Tommi.

So lets start with Waylon b/c he is just awesome. He seriously is the best kid ever. He is so happy and really goes with the flow. I am crazy in love with him! He is not perfect in the sleeping anymore but it is not as bad as Miley. He also doesn't like to sleep with me at night so I think that leads to better sleep for me. Everyone who meets him is instantly happier b/c his big whole face smile. He is working on the whole sitting up thing but so far he is not too sturdy. He is rolling both ways and some how prefers his belly now crazy. Still a chunky boy. He is seriously so solid...making carrying the carseat a blast. He loves his sisters so much and just loves to watch them.

Miley is well Miley. She is crazy! There is no slowing her down and she keeps us entertained with her antics. She still has such a baby cartoon voice. It leads to most people not being able to understand her. She is down to only passys in her bed. I'm still debating how I'm going to take them away. She is still so much of my baby. Potty training is a joke. She wants very little to do with it. I need to get serious and work on it bc I need her out of diapers! She is such a sweet little booger though and we are totally buds! Still so tiny but giant in personality.

Tommi is doing phenomenal in school. She is maturing a lot. We do see a lot of acting out at home but I think that is just b/c she has to sit and listen all day so she takes the bad out on us. I seriously can't believe she is in school all day. It is sad to be away from her so much. But she is thriving and we do fine so it is ok. She is not crying any more thank goodness but she still doesn't eat well. I found some granola/chia seed bars she likes so at least she gets something good. I seriously am so amazed and proud of her. She is reading and doing well in everything she does. Pretty incredible!

Life is good! We are finding our groove.

Life

Lets start with school...we are starting week 7...holy cow!

So Tommi went 3 full weeks and then the 4th week she went Monday and Tuesday no problem. Wednesday morning she woke up and had some strange anxiety, said her stomach hurt, and wanted me to take her. So I agreed. I chalked it up to constipation. We got there a little late bc I had to round up all the troops but arrived as the announcements finished. She went to class no problem. We headed home and when I got home I sat down to put Waylon to sleep and got a phone call that Tommi had come to the nurse crying and was in the clinic with a 101 fever. WTH! So I picked her up. We got home and temp was 99. It never went back up and she didn't seem like she felt bad other than her stomach cramped every once in a while. So she stayed home Thursday also b/c she had the fever Wednesday at school. Friday she went to school and was fine.

Week 5 Tommi went to school Monday and Tuesday. Wednesday she woke up and her throat hurt but we didn't see anything so she went and about 1230 TJ got a call from his mom that Tommi had been laying her head down all morning and was crying at lunch. Her temp was 100. So TJ picked her up and brought her home. She laid on the couch all afternoon she was running a 99-100 fever. That night she went to bed and when I went in to turn her reading lights off she was burning up. Her fever was 104! All morning Thursday she was on the couch with a 100-101 temp and just seemed so miserable...at noon her temp spiked to 103. She was whining of her stomach hurting, sore throat, and had no appetite. So I just felt the need to take her in to the dr. I gave her Tylenol at noon and after that she pepped up a bit. I was brave and took all 3 kids at naptime but felt she needed to be seen b/c I was fearing strep though we saw nothing in her throat. Well the dr said there was nothing to swab in her throat so she said despite her thoughts it was not strep. So she did a test for mono...a blood test...yes not fun! Well it came back as mono...meaning it is a virus so there is nothing that we can do but we at least knew. So she is supposed to be out of contact sports for 3 weeks due to possible enlarged spleen and if hit it can rupture. So she ran a low temp Thursday evening of 100. But we never gave meds b/c she was comfortable. That was her last temp. So it was a quick one. The dr said we would probably not know if Waylon or Miley got it b/c it is so minor in littler kids. But good news is she is done with mono and will never have to worry about it again.

Week 6
We had major anxiety and tears ALL week.
I took her Monday morning and she cried and clung to me begging me not to leave her. THAT WAS SO HARD!!!
The rest of the week she would cry when she left me, cry when she left Barbara, lunch time, and many times through out the day. So there was lots of emails with teacher and just convo with everyone wondering what could be going on. My heart broke so much for her.

Week 7
Monday-NO TEARS! Thank you Jesus. Praying the rest of the week will be great. I think as of now she just had so much anxiety about going back and ending up not feeling good again and I wouldn't be there. She said this morning "I cant do this" and "My stomach hurts too bad to go" but she went and did well. At bedtime again she said "I can't do this" but I know she will do great.


Week 5 was a tough on b/c that Monday on the way to town Miley started throwing up. Ugh! She threw up a couple times in the car and didn't eat anything but apple sauce on Monday or Tuesday. But she was fine after that. That Sunday she had eaten a bunch of nuts and that is all she was throwing up with a tiny bit of liquid and they were hardly chewed up. So not sure if a bug made her sick or the nuts but it was a crappy week.

Tommi is growing up and showing so much maturity and amazing me with all she is learning in school.

Miley is a pistol as always and has us cracking up all the time!

Waylon is still amazing! He has his little moments of fussing here and there but seriously he is the most amazing child ever. He is so happy and content most of the time. I am just in awe of him! He is perfection!

Now if I can get into a routine and catch up on house work I will be doing much better. But that is life and I am loving it...well feeling disappointed in myself but I'll be good! My kids are awesome!

Tommi did start soccer the other week and she is such a hoot. She just runs around and cheers, rarely touching the ball but she LOVES it! She is getting better but as long as she loves it and is working up a good sweat, I could care less if she is just the cheerleader.

School is in session...

So we are officially going into day 4 of school...

My life is already so different. I kinda feel lost during the day b/c I have 2 little kids and no "bigger kid" conversation. I have found Miley is easier with out Tommi around b/c she is not constantly on edge that someone is going to do her wrong. I have enjoyed our time together already.

So how did it go? How is it going?

Day 1- Dispite staying up till 11 pm the night before due to excitement (yes she was in her bed!) Tommi woke up with bells on. SOOOO ready. We made pancakes but she didn't eat. So we went to school and she was ready but wanted me to hold her hand as we walked to class...gladly my sweet girl, gladly. So I held it together...until I stepped out of the room. I lost it to say the least...I think I even scared some kids. I was a total mess! I got to my van and was losing it...it really was so sad. I felt like my heart was just ripped out, like I was giving my baby away. I seriously thought about going in and saying "Never mind, I can't do this." I called my mom who helped a lot. By the time I got home I felt much better.
By the afternoon I was SOOO anxious to get her back. She came home bouncing off the walls. She loved school as expected. She made friends and was thrilled with it all.

Day 2- A bit tougher to wake up. But she was asleep by 845pm so that should have helped. No tears. She led me to her class. She said it was a good day. Still very excited about it.

Day 3- Still not liking getting up but was asleep by 815pm the night before so we are getting used to this earlier bed time. But ready for school! No tears and she ran ahead of me to class.
After school the helper didn't trust Tommi when she said she was supposed to go to her grandmothers classroom so they stuck her in the cafeteria and she cried but of course grandma got her but she was a bit shaken b/c she didn't like the change of routine. But the teacher is aware and will make sure it doesn't happen again.

The first day she ate a little at lunch but ate the rest on the way home. The 2nd day she ate a little at lunch, someone else ate some of her food before leaving school, snacked a little on the way home but had food left. Day 3 she came home with a full lunch box minus her chocolate chip muffins. She doesn't eat much breakfast, barely snacks, then doesn't eat lunch. It is crazy but I'm hoping it is a phase.

I'm settling into routine. The early wake up is tough b/c Waylon likes to stay up late then I need me time so I don't get a lot of sleep but hopefully with time he will get into routine and we will do better.

I hate her being gone all day but it is nice to see how much she loves it!

Not ready for school

Well Tommi starts school in a week and a half and I'm SO not ready.

I'm not ready to not be in control and take care of her all the time. To not be there to have her back all the time. I'm not ready for her to have to eat lunch with out my help.

I'm just plain not ready. She is such a tender soul, though she is tough as nails. I just hope she is nice to everyone b/c in a new situations she sometimes lashes out.

I know she is ready...like REALLY ready. Not only b/c she is smart and needs more of a challenge but b/c she is ready for new friends and the lessons of life.

She is really excited and I am really excited for her. The distance will be good (esp since she has a major tude now!) but I will be counting the minutes till she comes back to me and tells me all about it!!!!

I have such mixed emotions but ready or not here it comes and I will take the bull by the horns and this will be good!

I am loving the back to school shopping for supplies and clothes! Plus I can't wait to go see her new classroom and all the fun school stuff that goes with it! I used to love going in to find my desk and the newness of friends and meeting the teacher!

This WILL be good and God promised to see me through so he will!

Miley passy

As of last week we started limiting Miley's passys to bed and the car. She has done amazing...especially for an addict. She asks everyonce in a while but is so good about putting it in the bowl in the morning and leaving it in the car! Thank you Jesus.

We will have to take it away totally soon but for now this is amazing. She seems like she has grown up so much and is a lot less whiney!

The first day she picked up one of Waylon's passys and I said "What are you doing?" She said "Just trying it out for a little while." wow

Then the other day she said "I need a passy to cover my lips."

This girl is a ham and seriously has us cracking up all the time.

My spunky girl for sure!

7 weeks

Well Waylon has been here for over 7 weeks now...it feels like he was just born.

He is still a dream baby! He is so laid back and just goes with the flow. He seriously fits right in! He eats, sleeps, poops, observes, smiles, and snuggles. It is a dream come true. I am crazy in love with him...to be expected but it still amazes me everytime how much you can love another human who really has no "true" personality.

He eats every 2-4 hours then kinda cluster feeds for an hour at night after the girls go to bed. Then he goes to his bed and sleeps till around 3, snacks, then is back down till 6 ish, snacks, then back to bed till usually around 9. It is AWESOME! Night time before bed is his most demanding time b/c he just wants to nurse and snuggle. But he sleep all night in his own bed.
I co-slept with the girls and loved the snuggles but I think I am much happier with a child who stays in his bed. If he was a demanding newborn like the girls, he would be in my bed but he likes his bed. So that is a win-win for us all!

He is the noisiest little sleeper. He makes noises all the time.

He weighed 11lbs 14oz as of last Thursday at 6 weeks! So he is my big boy still!

His eyes are still a dark blue so we will see if that changes.

He LOVES to be outside and it has been really pretty and mild lately so that is so nice that he can get some good outside time.

The girls are still goo-goo over him. Tommi holds him a lot and most of the time he will just cuddle up and sleep in her arms, even if I hand him to her awake. He is SO good about just falling asleep when held it is awesome. The girls LOVE to talk to him and ask about him immediately when they get up. Miley LOVES to kiss him. She also still calls him "baby Hug-o" sometimes but most of the time he is "Yalen baby" She shows him to everyone and tells anyone who is around "That my baby brother" It is awesome. Tommi of course loves to show him off too. She is so proud of him! They both say he is their baby :) Poor guy has so much love he is smothered.

He is not a big carseat fan but not bad. He doesn't like to sleep in it much but is quiet and will fade in and out during the day if we are out. But night driving with him is horrible. He screams until you take him out and then he is totally content. If it was not dangerous I would totally just hold him in the car b/c he is happy in my arms...always!

He started smiling last week and though it is only once or twice a day it is so awesome!

When put on his tummy he just lays his head down. He honestly doesn't even try to look around. But when holding him upright on my shoulder he is all eyes everywhere and lifting his head to look if I have him on my chest. I think he is just lazy and doesn't want to have to work so he just chills. Plus his head is heavy!

I made him max out his newborns so he just moved to 0-3 months all the time but he won't be in them long. Some are getting pretty tight.

He is my perfect little man! Seriously crazy in love!

So crazy in love...

I have so many men in my life that I love so much...but I think I found the one that trumps them all! :)

I keep saying knock on wood that things don't shift as he "wakes up" more. But so far Waylon has been my easiest baby BY FAR! This also may be exaggerated b/c he is my third so I am MUCH less nervous.

He seriously LOVES to sleep. He wakes (on his own) every 2 to 3 hours to eat and he eats like a mad man then sometimes he hang out awake for a short while (rare) but most of the time he just goes back to sleep until he needs to eat again! It is crazy! Now I know this will change and I'm ok with that but for now I am enjoying the gentle transition into having 3 kids. I do pray he stays easy and continues to just go with the flow.

Waylon is so cuddly too. He somehow find the perfect position when cuddling it is awesome.

He is also the king of hiccups which disturbs his sleep sometimes but we figure it out.

He loves his momma haha I think all my kids have at this stage though b.c I kinda am the main caregiver and food source.

I'm seriously just so crazy in love with him and his sweet self. I just love to kiss his sweet face and snuggle him.

Night is the same as day in that he wakes every 3 or so hours to eat but he eats and is back to sleep!

Praying hard he stays not fussy.

So I also have to say how crazy in love with my husband I am right now. He is stepping it up like never before it is SO amazing! I seriously don't have to even ask for help most of the time, he just volunteers and takes things on I never expect him to. I am SO blessed!!!

I am starting to feel like our little family is complete...it just feels right. Hoping my heart continues to feel that way even as he grows up.

I am also crazy in love with how amazing my girls are doing. They both have their moments of misbehaving but over all they have done so well! They are so in love with their brother it is awesome! Miley wants to kiss him all the time! She still calls him "Baby Hug-o" it is too cute!

3rd time mom

There are many ways you know you are a first time mom...

When I had Tommi I wrote down everytime she fed, which side, how long (exactly), and how the feed was. I did that for a few weeks.

With Miley I wrote it down a little but not as much detail...for about 2 weeks.

With Waylon...yeah I have written nothing down and hardly pay attention to the time haha

He is my biggest so I am not worried as much but still it is funny how that works.

Baby Hugo!!!!!

Well "baby Hugo" has arrived and his official name is WAYLON THOR FRAZIER. He is referred to as baby Hugo still most of the time haha Poor guy may never live that one down.

His sisters are crazy in love with him! Miley's reactions was PERFECT! She was so excited to meet him and wanted to hold him immediately! It was amazing! Of course Tommi took to him like I expected! They both had hearts in their eyes from moment one!

Well lets rewind and document his birth story...
Saturday June 14th we didn't do anything special I felt pretty normal during the day just like I have been feeling recently nothing "odd". We went to church that evening and TJ's uncle Ronald joked about me being about to pop and I seriously thought "It may be another 2 weeks of this." We came home put the girls to bed and then I hung out for a bit but decided to go to bed about 11pm. I zonked out...
Sunday June 15th at 2:00am I "peed" myself...or so I thought. I got up and laughed b/c I seriously thought I must have had a dream and peed. So I went in and peed some more. I changed my clothes and it occurred to me my water could have broken but it wasn't a big flood (like it was with the  girls) so I doubted it. I laid back down and with my mind racing I started cramping like just mild menstrual cramps, I got up b/c I knew I was not falling back to sleep soon. So I was in and out of the bathroom b/c I felt like I had to pee and pacing. Timing the random contractions I was having but they were mild I only knew if I felt the tightening in my belly (and the fact the fluid kept leaking when I had contractions haha but the cramping was getting worse. I started noticing I was losing my plug when I went to the bathroom so I figured that might be what was going on. So I walked around thinking things might stop soon. But I just didn't feel good. So I woke TJ up at 230ish and told him I didn't feel good. In the back of my mind I knew my water had broken but I was just kinda dilutional I guess (just like I was with Miley) well after talking to him a bit I noticed my contractions were about 2-3 min apart but they still were crampy more than painful contractions. I could still talk through them. But he said we needed to head out...so he called his parents. I tried to text and call mine...just so they knew what was up but no one answered.
We left the house a little after 3am. I called the midwifes to tell them I was headed out.
We got to the hospital and I was really hurting. Finally got to our room and the nurse gave me a gown but when I went to change I really didn't want to b/c I was hurting so bad so I just took off my underwear. I got in bed and told TJ he needed to get the nurse b/c I felt like I needed to push. He went out to let her know. They came back in to check me and sure enough I was ready to go haha
My midwife was not there yet so they talked about finding any dr they could no matter if they were part of the practice I was with or not haha
They got a dr in there and suited up but minutes later my midwife walked in (in flip flops haha) She said I sounded so calm that she didn't rush. The nurses all kept saying the same thing, that I seemed to calm to be as far along as I was.
Well I'm not sure how much time passed or how many times I pushed (but supposedly I am a strong pusher haha) Well it felt like it took forever but FINALLY I delivered and felt like a MILLION bucks b/c he was not easy to deliver! They laid him on my chest and I seriously was on cloud 9. He was SO amazing. The first thing I looked for when they lifted him up to me was if it was for sure a boy! haha and there was no doubt. I seriously was in my own world after that! Just loving him!
After a while they took him away to weigh him and all that. Well he was hard to deliver b/c he was 9LBS!!! Well 8lbs 15.5ozes but they said if he had not pooped in utero (they didn't tell me that till later) he probably would have been 9lbs! I was in total shock but kinda proud of myself.
So I did find out later he pooped in utero but I guess they were not too worried...thank you Jesus!

He was not a happy camper for the first couple hours of life...just really fussy. But after he finally nursed he did well and passed out.

He is the most amazing little thing ever!

Note...arrived at hospital around 3:40am delivered at 4:09am
On our 8th anniversary and Fathers day!

How are you feeling?

This question is such a kind question....BUT when asked EVERYDAY and multiple times a day for the purpose of wanting to know if I'm feeling labor pains it is one of the most annoying questions ever!!!!! Look people I will tell you when I'm in labor!

The conversation usually is
Them: How are you feeling?
Me: Good. Same as I have been just chugging along.
Them: Aww.

Uhh...seriously? A smile and a "I'm glad you are feeling good." would be REALLY nice. It is like people feel bad for me b/c I am super pregnant. Please people do not feel bad for me...be tough for me! I am emotional, worn out..physically and mentally, and just need POSTIVE comments.

I DO NOT need to hear when YOU think the baby will be here...side note: I do not mind it from my immediate family (mom, dad, brothers, husband) I do not mind if people say "My guess was/is ____." But the "Oh there is no way you will got over due" or the constant change of guesses from people who was not in my comfort zone (which is VERY small) I just don't need their opinion.
Honestly if I could hibernate I would. I honestly would crawl in a hole and sleep b/c I get so tired of the comments. I mean I know no one means any harm but it is just so annoying to hear how big I am or how people feel so bad for me.

I AM FINE! I am carrying a healthy FULL TERM baby! I could not ask for more. If God planned my babies to be late then I'm good with that! I seriously do not want them to come a second sooner than God planned (obviously they can't) but I just praise the Lord for having THREE healthy pregnancies. I mean seriously I am blessed beyond my own understanding to carry my babies. I enjoy them SO much! Yes I have pain and discomfort...ask TJ I complain a lot. Ask my girls they have to sacrifice right now b/c mommy can't do as much.

I would take going overdue over having to pray my babies stay in till a certain point ANY DAY! God created my body to do this, I came into this world predestine to do this.

So please approach me with a POSTIVE attitude. Tell me how great I look (even if you have to lie!!), tell me how great I am doing, tell me I'm tough, tell me I am your hero, I don't care just pat me on the back and help me along.
I have said this a million times I would not be where I am with out my mom and TJ!!! I seriously could not be more thankful for them. They both listen to me complain but don't feel sorry for me b/c they know it is what it is and this baby will come when he is supposed to. They encourage me to keep on keepin on and I NEED that!

So there is my rant...

How am I truly feeling? I am VERY tired, I have had a lot of shooting pains from pressure, he is on a nerve that makes my right leg buckle everyonce in a while, I have burning like my skin is on fire right at my bikini line on my right leg, I have heartburn, I feel like my ribs are about to break, my hands and feet hurt like I have arthritis, I have to wake up and painfully roll over a couple times a night, and with all that said. I am loving his shifts and movements, how he pushes his feet out on my left side where I look like I have a ball coming out the side, I love my big belly b/c it is just fun!, and I love the thought of actually carrying one of Gods miracles, I love to feel tough like at the end of the day that I accomplished something in just getting through another day, and I love that I am fully capable of (almost) fully functioning when SO many have problems by this point.

I know women carry babies and give birth everyday but somehow I feel kinda like I'm super woman just for enduring it all. I love it!

I love being pregnant and am going to miss it but I also am ready to be back to somewhat normal and be able to lean over haha Life is good.

I admit I have been slightly depressed every passing day that I don't have him but then again life is going to get crazy so him staying in allows me time to prepare more. I just want the world to meet the little man and I want to see his face. I feel like I already know him but in reality I am going to meet him too. This is just so fun!

Vent over but I love documenting my thoughts b/c I have done so little of it this time.

38 WEEKS

Well here we are 38 weeks with my last baby and precious little boy. I seriously feel the last month has gone by faster than any other month. It has been insane!
How I feel...which I am asked many times daily...I feel 9 months pregnant but I really can't complain much. I have pain and sometimes lots of it, I'm tired, and over all uncomfortable. I have lots of cramps recently! Well if I sit still I feel great! haha But I seriously could have it SO much worse! I am also honestly loving this little guys crazy movements, lots of hiccups, and the belly is fun (except for when it gets in the way). Pregnancy is seriously such a miracle!

I am SO anxious to meet him and love him. I am anxious to have a sweet newborn lay on my chest and just be content. I can not wait to see the girls with their little brother and to create a new little life. It will be VERY challenging but fun!

So I had my 38 week appt today...I had never met this midwife and she was nice but kinda vague and not real warm. So the appt was very fast! She asked if I was using any supplements for labor and I said no...she suggested Gentle Birth but after looking it up it helps with advancing dilation, quicker labor, and quicker recovery. It is not worth buying for me. I will just see how things go on their own...I have loved my last 2 births so I am trusting this one will be good too.
She did check me and I am 1cm, 70% effaced, and baby is at station -2. His heartbeat was 130-140bpm and I am measuring 40 weeks...eek! I have never measured ahead in my other pregnancies but I have a few times in this one.

TJ's guess is June 11 (next Wednesday), mom's guess is June 18 (the next Wednesday) and my guess is June 16 (a week from Monday)

Guess we will see when God has this little one planned!!

Today...

Tommi has been trying to learn to pump on the swing but when we are around she seems to give up easily and want us to push her. Well today she wanted to go swing before church but we had to get ready so we told her she could go out  by herself and swing but we couldn't go out. So we just kept the front door open and came out and talked to her while we got ready. She sat on the swing for a bit and you could tell she was bored so I came out on the porch to talk to her and she asked me to push her I said no I was not coming down there. I told her she came do it she just needs to try. Well low and behold with in a minute she was swinging by herself! It was SO awesome! She was so proud of herself as we are! She was just not giving herself enough credit! Yay for success but good gracious when did my baby grow up!?!


Also at church Miley was sitting on my lap touching my belly so I said "Who is in my belly?" She said "Baby Hugo, MY baby Hugo. Come out." (she pronounces it Hug-O haha too cute) It was so sweet! I'm hoping she is warming up to the idea and thankful she is at least some what ok with it even though she has NO idea what is about to happen to her little world. She is such a momma's girl so I'm hoping she tolerates him pretty well.

I will be 36 weeks tomorrow! How crazy!

Emotional

Holy moses am I crazy emotional!!! I seriously have cried about EVERYTHING!

I was cleaning the bathroom today and around my tub their are a lot of nooks and crannies (reason #1 I hate big bathtubs!) Well I could not get in a certain section and started crying b/c it bothered me so bad that I couldn't get it clean...note..I never have been able to so why this bugged me now I have no idea.
I usually am one who can get my feelings hurt relatively easy but right now it is times 10! It is frustrating how bad it is, I do not remember my emotions this out of wack with the girls. But here we are and things could be ALOT worse.

I am also dealing with some crazy pain...I feel like I have been riding a horse for a week non stop. My inner thighs and pubic bone are SO sore! It gets better with rest and does not hurt all the time but mainly when I am in bed and when I have been on my feet too much. Rolling over in bed is tough but then also hurts so bad I get teary eyed everytime I roll over...so like 3 to 4 times a night on a good night. I did ask my midwife about it and she said it was pretty normal and is due to my pelvis being looser this time...yay!

Again I can't complain too much b/c I do not have it as bad as some. Plus I kinda have no choice but to keep on chugging along. Almost nightly baths helps a lot!

I also have gained quite a bit of weight with this little guy...eek! I hit the 30 pound mark this week and I still have 5 weeks to go...oops! My midwife has not said anything but I know my body is NOT happy!

But oh boy am I enjoying this little man and how crazy active he is! I am crazy in love with him and his silly self. I can not rest my hands/arms/anything on my belly with out him going crazy to kick it off! Tommi thinks it is hilarious and loves to lay on him to get him annoyed! She also loves his hiccups but the kicks and big movements are her favorite. Mine too!

I had an ultrasound and centering last night. The u/s was so sweet! He was cuddled up to my placenta and did not want to come off so we could get some really good pictures of his face...we did see him pretty well though. He is head down and ready to rumble! Fluid is good. He also was showing off his boy parts once again :) He punched the wand a couple times! So the ultrasound was over all great. I wish I had asked about his size but that is always a guess so it is no big deal. The tech did worry me when she was trying hard to get him off his placenta b/c she seemed to want to see his face better for a reason but I'm hoping that was just my worrying self reading into things.

Centering was good...nothing exciting.

I was supposed to start weekly appointments next week but when I called today the only appointment they could get was Monday at 1pm and I thought that was silly b/c it is less than a week since my last appt and the next is almost 2 weeks later. So I asked if they minded if I just waited till I go back to centering on the 29th and they said that was fine esp since this is my 3rd so I kinda know what is up. But then I did set up weeklys for week 38 and week 40 (39 weeks is centering) I am hoping I do not make it to my 40 week one which is the Thursday after I'm due. I'm praying for a due date baby or a couple days early.  Crazy to think I only have 3 more appointments till my due date! eek! So exciting yet nerve racking.

My MIL, SIL, and Aunt in law decided they wanted to do a shower for me since I am having a boy this time....I'm excited. I basically just need/want some more clothes, diapers (i'm not doing cloth until we are in a routine), double stroller, and odds and ends boy stuff. So due to crazy schedules of everyone involved the shower is not until June 5th. So I will be 38 weeks.

My Thursday nights for the next 4 weeks are booked haha Tommi's preschool graduation, then centering, then my shower, and then another centering haha Thursdays are good days!

I really want to meet this guy but then again want time to slow down b/c I want to enjoy this time but I am ready for June when the only plans I have are drs appts and shower. No more school for Tommi and no weekend plans except chillin with my little family which I am hoping we can find some adventures to get into so we can celebrate these girls some more.

I'm not as able to do as much and with the warm weather I feel like such a downer for the girls but the cuddle time has been AMAZING!!! I am really sad thinking about having to share the attention even more soon but it will work out and I'm going to balance it. I just want my girls to know how much they are loved by momma b/c I know others will take over and help with them in the beginning but there is NO ONE like momma and I want them to know this little guy is NOT going to replace them and he will fall into our family well b/c God put him here and will take care of us. I am much more worried about Miley b/c I know Tommi understands...mostly.

But like when I had Miley, things will fall into place!

If I'm right on my guess which actually I have been one day off with both my girls. I guessed the 11th for Tommi and 18th for Miley. Then it will be exactly a month!

Praying for good labor and perfect baby!

My wish for Tommi was to have her daddys blue eyes, with Miley I wanted a dark little one, and this time I am dreaming of a bald blue eyed boy. So since I have gotten my wish the last 2 times hopefully I will this time too! I will be shocked to see if he has hair b/c I just can't see it for some reason.

School field trip...

Today Tommi had a field trip to an elementary school, it is not the one she will go to but most of her preschool will go there.

I went along and she was SO excited to go! They first talked with the principal in the cafeteria then they went on a bus ride around the neighborhood, then went outside and got to play on the playground. They got to walk through a 5th grade classroom, watch a PE class, and visit with a kindergarten teacher. They went to the big kid bathrooms by themselves (though Tommi's super pregnant mommy had to pee too so Tommi didn't get to go alone haha) then they went to the cafeteria and went through the line and got their own tray all by themselves. After lunch they went to the library and read books with the librarian. That was it for the day but they all did so well!

So Tommi did really well she talked a lot and answered every question but that just reminded me she is definitely mine!

The only down fall of the day was the cafeteria....all went well, she went in and got her tray with her food with no help and I didn't even instruct her before hand how to do it she just followed the lead of the others and got her tray and came out and sat at the table she was supposed to sit at. She got pizza, chocolate milk, they put green beans, cooked carrots, and a fruit blend on her tray. So when she sat down I could see in her face she was on edge b/c she didn't want anything but the pizza and milk. She held it together and ate some and talked a lot. Then came time for clean up...the cafeteria lady came around and collected their silverware then walked around with a trash can and they were supposed to throw their napkin and milk carton in the trash can then take their tray up with any left over food to the window. Well as the lady came around I saw the fire blare in Tommi's eyes b/c she was not done with her milk and she was not giving it up, so she just ignored the lady and kept drinking. The lady was kinda a hard nosed one but she told Tommi she had to throw it away time was up. I had to step in and tell her she had no choice b/c time was up and the whole class and teachers were waiting on her. The tears broke free at that moment and she lost it. She did throw her milk away but then told me to take her tray up but I told her she had to. Through the tears she grabbed it and took it up. I had to walk away as she was going up b/c seeing her cry broke my heart and I knew the feelings she was having. I wanted to scoop her up and save the day but I couldn't! She has to be a big girl. But it just reminded me I need to time her lunch and get her used to that. She will pack and I think the actually day it comes around she will be ok but I hated it! Of course it was all that more embarrassing b/c my emotional self cried but I didn't let Tommi see that!

So her favorite part of the day was the playground and of course least favorite was lunch.

She is now telling me she doesn't want to go to kindergarten and wants to stay home with me but I am just hoping and praying it is nerves. I know she is ready but can't help but feel like I just want to keep my baby home and away from the troubles of the world.

But we lived and we did well!

5 year old

A little late but Tommi's 5 year old birthday questions...

20 Questions...answered by Tommi on 5/3/2014

1. What is your favorite color? PINK AND PURPLE
2. What is your favorite toy? DOLL/DOLLHOUSE
3. What is your favorite fruit? STRAWBERRIES
4. What is your favorite tv show? SHERIFF CALLIE, PEPPA PIG, AND BARBIE
5. What is your favorite thing to eat for lunch? TURKEY AND CHEESE / PB&HONEY
6. What is your favorite outfit? WHITE AND NAVY MAXI DRESS
7. What is your favorite game? CANDY LAND
8. What is your favorite snack? CHEEZ-ITS
9. What is your favorite animal? ZEBRA
10. What is your favorite song? B-I-B-L-E
11. What is your favorite book? CINDERELLA WEDDING BOOK
12. Who is your best friend? TITUS
13. What is your favorite cereal? LUCKY CHARMS
14. What is your favorite thing to do outside? SWING
15. What is your favorite drink? SPRITE
16. What is your favorite holiday? HALLOWEEN
17. What do you like to take to bed with you at night? HUGO
18. What is your favorite thing to eat for breakfast? NUTELLA CRACKERS
19. What do you want for dinner on your birthday? SUBWAY OR MCALLISTERS
20. What do you want to be when you grow up? A CHEERLEADER OR BE A DOCTOR

Anxious

The last couple days I have all the sudden found myself really anxious to meet this little boy! Of course I have felt like that off and on the whole time but I feel like I'm ready to see his face and love him.

BUT...and I mean a HUGE BUT....I am not done being pregnant so I am not that ready. If he was born now it would not be good b/c his lungs are not ready.

I have been saying the whole time that I want to go to 40 weeks but I think I'm kinda coming to terms that if he comes a week early I would be ok too. But with my history 40 weeks is a good guess.

If I were to pick his b-day I would want it on my mom's birthday (June 8) so that would be a day shy of 39 weeks. I know it would be the coolest birthday present she ever got...well she did get a new daughter in law in 2012 but a grandson might top that one haha even though Katie is pretty awesome!

I DO NOT want him born on the 15th. I'm gonna be selfish and admit I want to keep my anniversary separate from his birthday. Though it is Father's Day so that would be cool for TJ but I still would like to keep the 2 separate even if it is only by a day.

My best guess is he will be born on his due date b/c that is how both my girls were....well they were born on the day that the first u/s set their due date at. The dr always went by my LMP for my due date with them but this time they couldn't do that so they set it based on measurement. So It would actually be awesome to have all my kids born on the date their first u/s said.

So for fun if I had my way with the birth...I would put the girls down to bed then he would be born in the middle of the night...for many reasons this would be best for me...
-I would get to put my girls to bed
-TJ would be home so no need to call him
-I would get my bonding/nursing/chill time with him before anyone came to visit
-My girls could be well rested to meet their brother

But that would not be best for some reasons too...
-Miley does not wake up well to any one but me (I think she would do ok with my mom but she wouldnt' be here)
-That would mean TJ's parents would have to come stay at our house when we left and I would hate that for them b/c they wouldn't sleep...well his dad would but I doubt his mom would
-My mom would not get to meet baby till mid morning b/c she left middle of the night with Miley and lost good sleep...though would she really be able to sleep if I told her I was in labor haha maybe if that happens I will just have to send a text so she will get it when she gets up so I do not disturb the sleep she needs.

So second best...I would put the girls down for nap and leave while they are sleeping and have him around dinnertime so they could get up from nap, grab some dinner and then come visit which would give me time to bond and get ready to see the girls. Also that could work for my mom b/c she could pull that one off. Plus then I would HOPEFULLY spend that night in the hospital and then get out the next evening. So that would put less on others putting my kids down for bed and less stress on Miley having to go to bed for someone else.

Of course my thoughts are all envisioning me having a very quick labor like I did with Miley.

I DO NOT DO NOT DO NOT want people waiting in the waiting room like they did with Tommi b/c they came to meet Tommi before I was really ready. I want to give birth and nurse with in the first hour like I did with Miley and just calm down from the whirlwind before having visitors. Even my girls...I know I will be SO ready for them to meet him but I want that time with him.

My vision of them meeting him would be having him and TJ calling my mom and his parents when he is born and ready for visitors. Then he can go out and meet them in the waiting room and have the girls come in with just him and have baby boy in the crib thing so I can love on them first. Then they can put on their shirts and meet their brother! Then TJ can go get everyone else and they can all come and the girls can introduce their brother. I just really want them to feel like the total center of attention even if their brother really is haha Tommi is just going to bed SO proud. Miley will just like all the people loving on her and also by the point she meets him she will be glad to see me I'm sure. Well unless she has been spending time partying with Big Mama then she will not be as worried about me.
But the best plan of all is God's plan....last time the only thing I would have done differently would be Tommi would not have been sick! But otherwise the labor and birth was perfect. And with Tommi's birth I would have had people wait a bit longer before coming in to meet her b/c I was still in shock so I needed more time. But otherwise labor and delivery was exactly what was best for my first baby.

So 6 weeks to go sounds good...I'm just so excited to meet him and tell everyone his name b/c that has been hard to keep this time! But thankfully for the first time no one actually knows my babys name in advance! This one will be a real surprise....which is so fun! Ok so let's hope I can say that in 6 weeks!

I have got to slow down and enjoy this time with my froggy boy...he is jumping like a frog right now haha B/c I am going to miss this SO much!

I am REALLY looking forward to my next appt in 2 weeks b/c I will have an ultrasound and I am excited to see if we can see some sweet cheeks! They are really doing it as a position check but I am hoping the tech lets us see him a bit.

Holy crap I am going to be a mom of THREE next month!!! So crazy!!!!!

Little family...ramble

This evening we went to the ball field so TJ could hit and the girls could play. It was an adventure to say the least...but not so bad. Other than Miley falling in mud! But thankfully it was Miley b/c Tommi would have freaked. Miley fussed until she saw TJ had a towel to clean off her muddy arm then she was fine...muddy but fine.

Anyway...after 3 or 4 trips to the outfield with the girls so they could help collect balls with the guys I decided I wasn't going to keep walking out there. If the girls wanted to go they could but I was parking my fat butt on the bench.
Well as the girls chased TJ yelling "Daddy wait for us!" or Miley's version "Daddy stop...please! I coming!" then he stopped and waited and Miley's sweet voice saying "Thank you daddy...hold hand please" I couldn't help but just smile watching them in their little slice of heaven hanging out with their daddy and running free like a child should! I know how blessed I am but sometimes it just takes my breath away. I am a bit bias but I seriously have the 2 best girls around! (I even say this after a tough afternoon with Tommi and her wanna be 15 year old attitude) They love with all they have and forgive and forget how we all should. Miley could have pouted (like I would have) about her crazy messy leggings and being a bit chilly b/c they were wet but no she ran out to do it all again just to be with her daddy. Tommi could have kept a chip on her shoulder b/c she got in trouble at dinner for being a poop head, no she forgot and moved on.

At one point TJ said "I love you Tommi." she smiled and said "I love you too daddy" and one of the guys said "That won't last forever...she will not always feel that way" or something along those lines and I couldn't help but think...yes she will! She will ALWAYS love her daddy! She may not always like him but she will always love him! He may make her mad, frustrate her, etc but she will always think he is superman! After 28 years my daddy is still my hero and always will be. He has loved me so deep that he has made me mad and frustrated me but think of all the pain and frustration I have put him through and he loves me more than I understand. Even as a mother I know I will love my girls till my last breath and beyond but that love still amazes me. Love that deep can only be felt, never explained.

I just am taken back that they are really my kids! I mean I know I gave birth to them and have raised them for almost every second of their life but I still sometimes can't help but feel like I'm watching someone elses life, a life I dream of having. Not perfect but perfect all in the same breath.

Time goes by so fast and sometimes I just need to stop and catch up to it b/c I do not want to miss a thing. Pregnancy has brought on some really bad attitude days for me. I almost wake up counting the minutes till bedtime but I need to stop and remember these girls don't deserve my bad mood. They need their mommy to love them and be patient with them. Plus they are watching me and feeding off me. I need to be positive and enjoy life as they do!
Don't get my wrong I KNOW I am blessed but human nature and stupid hormones mess me up sometimes! I just thank God for blessing me with this life b/c I don't deserve even a fraction of what I am given!

Another thing that is really cool is to watch the young guys TJ plays ball with and watch them look at him with his family and desire that. He is a good example to them and I love that he can be. No he is not able to go hang out with the guys as much as them and has to always "ask his old lady" before doing things. But he has SO much more. Being a single guy who can do as he pleases will only get you so far but that love of a family and somewhere to "belong" when everything else is gone.

In true Laura fashion I get overly emotional and ramble but I am just amazed at my own life.

As my son tries to bust his way out of my belly via my belly button I can't help but just smile b/c being pregnant is such a miracle!!!

Growing up

It is crazy at times how grown up Miley is getting...well both my girls but Miley has really grown up recently!

She is SOOO expressive when she talks and uses her hands all the time! It is adorable!

So the other night we had a church dinner and Miley wanted some of my drink. She was holding the cup and looked at me and said "What is it mommy?" Sounds so little but it made me laugh so hard b/c she seriously formed a full sentence and also the fact she thought through that. It was so cute. So I told her it was lemonade and she took a sip and said "I yike it mommy!" then when she handed it back she said "Thank you mommy for a sip of lemonade" WHAT?! She has always said thank you but just recently has started telling us what she is thanking us for. With her cute little voice everything she says is so adorable!
This morning I yawned and Miley said "Tired mommy?" as she shrugged her shoulders and I told her I was. She said "Go to bed momma!" Oh I wish I could but it is so not that easy my sweet girl!

I wish I could bottle her up! She is a pistol but good gracious does she have my heart!!!

My love bugs

I am always shocked to hear how Miley is really putting the world together now and can communicate more than I expect. It is silly things but it is awesome.

This morning I was going to the bathroom and she said "mommy wait for me!" A simple statement but not something I have taught her she just heard it and understood.
Then she shut the door behind me and I was asking her why she did it and she said "I don't know hand did it." so I told her to open it...knowing she is too small. She tried then turned to me looking defeated and said "Can't mommy, too little, sorry." with the most pitiful voice and face!

We were getting out of the van at Target and I was carrying her she tried to get down and said "Walk mommy, snow gone!" I kinda laughed but then realized this morning I told her she couldn't walk to the van b/c there was snow on the ground and I didn't want her slipping. So amazing!

Then in the pet store she was going around naming the colors and the animals and her little brain was just working up a storm. She even told me she didn't want certain puppies jumping on her b/c they would knock her over. She knew the little ones wouldn't but the bigger ones would!

It is a daily thing...if not hourly. I just can't get enough of her! She is amazing!

Tommi is also taking my breath away these days! She is SO into this having a little brother thing. She will love on "Hugo" many times during the day and talk to him. It is awesome. Yesterday he was moving a ton and I told her to come watch my belly move and she did then she put her hand on it and felt him kick a bunch. She was SO excited! Usually he stops when she has her hand there and she is too impatient to wait. So I was excited she got to feel him! She is just amazing!

I am just blessed all around with these girls and they are so different yet so much love comes from both of them! They are pickles but also the sweetest things around! I'm a blessed momma!

I'm not ready...

This is totally my vent and documentation of my feelings....

I knew Tommi was going to starts school...duh! And I was pumped for her! I thought heck what are all these moms stressing about your kid just goes to school and it is fine. Yeah...the joke is on me!

Tomorrow I go to register Tommi for kindergarten...that is NOT the hard part. It will be the day I drop her off at school...when I have to go through a 8 hour day with out my baby, my side kick, my Tommi girl! I'm not sure how to do it...yes I will have MANY distractions but she is my girl!

I'm SO ready for her to blossom and watch her grow but school is a whole new ball game!

Wow this is gonna be tough! I have SO many anxieties about everything from dropping her off or letting my MIL take her to picking her up or letting my MIL bring her home. I mean I know it is logical to let her take her and pick her up since she is going to the school anyway but at the same time...she is in a car with someone else with out me...one of my biggest fears! Seriously it is crippling at times if I don't control it.

We will survive and I believe we will both thrive from the separation and the new level of connection but I'm scared! I'm not only scared of being away from her but I'm scared of mean kids. I had so many kids who hurt my sweet innocent heart and it hurt enough to go through it myself but to watch her is going to be even harder!

Then again I have a VERY strong willed and amazing child who have the ability to love like no other. She is also extremely clever. She is going to lead the pack and be such a light to others!

It will be in God's hands b/c there is no way I can do this alone!

Land of the living...

I feel like I can finally say we are back to the land of the living. Our run with sickness went on and on...with Miley throwing up all night one night, TJ getting sick, and me battling a cough/cold for 2 weeks!

But we are healthy and the only effects we are seeing...well feeling now are my tailbone still being sore. But I can live with that for sure!!!

Now if we can only keep the warm weather and not get anymore snow life will be even better!

So life is pretty darn good! Woohoo!

I am 27 weeks pregnant today...3 months from due and entering the final trimester! Holy moly where has time gone! But I could not be more excited to meet this little man that is so crazy in my belly all the time.
Honestly I'm a bit nervous how Miley is going to handle a new baby but like I was nervous with having Miley it will work out! She will figure it out and we will rock this!

I have to go this week and register Tommi for Kindergarten! Again...where has time gone?!? She will be amazing but I am so used to her being my side kick I am not liking the idea of her being away all day! But it again will work out and she will be AMAZING!!! She is SO stinking smart and an amazing friend. I look forward to watching her blossom!

Miley is a hoot...what's new with that! She is growing up so much with her communication and just things she does! I'm SO proud of her! She is DEFINITELY 2 years old! Holy fits!!! But we are working on them and getting through it day by day. She is still a picky/finicky eater but we will get somewhere one day. She LOVES chicken nuggets right now. I guess it is not the worst thing ever.
We just met up with my parents in Richmond this past weekend and she sure does love her big mama and pappy! She had not seen them in almost a month and has talked about them everyday. So when they showed up to the tournament she didn't know how to contain herself! The entire day she did not want to leave big mama's side! Then when it came to goodbye...I wanted to curl up in a ball and cry myself. She was SO upset she was hysterical for a while in the car and blamed me thinking I was taking her away from them as punishment. Anytime we get ready to go somewhere or arrive anywhere she says "Big mama, Pappy, Rooney, Dean, Lilly?!" Actually tonight when I put her to bed I said "I will see you in the morning!" She said "and Pappy too!" We thankfully get to see them this coming weekend but she is ready now! Hopefully this is just a phase b/c it is very hard to take her away when she does that!

Hugo Mickey Hank....whatever his name is :) officially has a name. I told TJ he could name him but then the name he chose just didn't settle right with me. So I talked to him about it and told him I would go with it if his heart was set but wasn't really fully on board. He decided to change it and I'm hoping he is as happy with it. I think it is PERFECT and can not wait to tell the world when he arrives! He is going to be so loved and awesome!!!

Overall I'm feeling really good. My tailbone is still sore and I'm having normal pregnancy problems like heartburn and trouble leaning over. But overall I feel better now than I did at 22 weeks and before. I was having some serious pain in my legs but that is gone! Hopefully for good or for a while. I was told by the midwife that it would probably get worse with time but woohoo it is gone! I still don't sleep all that well but again pregnancy has it's downfalls!
I am LOVING this crazy little boy's movements and just carrying him!

Haha I'm gonna be a mom of 3 kids! I don't feel old enough or mature enough for this but love it!!! Now here is to us all staying healthy!!! No more sickness!!!!

Extra Ultrasound

I could not wrap my mind around this baby really being a boy. I would say it but deep down I kept doubting.

Since we were going to be in Va Beach I set up a 3D ultrasound!

I kept doubting myself b/c it was money we really didn't need to spend but now I am SO glad I did it!!!

We definitely have a little boy! He showed us all his goodies!

We also got to see him yawn ALOT! He was holding his umbilical cord which was super cute.

It was just a lot of fun to see him and fall more in love with him!!!

Now let the boy stuff begin...I'm already addicted!

I have not gotten a chance to upload the tons of pictures from the ultrasound but here is one of our many "boy" pictures!!

WOW

So here I am thinking I had been through the ringer with Miley coming down with the flu. Well I continued to take care of her and finally Wednesday she was 24 hours fever free. So the light was there and I was ready to finally get on with my life. Oh what little I knew...
Wednesday since Miley was in the clear we planned to go to town...I went out to go to the car and slipped due to rain and lack of traction on my shoes and either badly bruised my tailbone or broke it! I was in a lot of pain but figured the baby is cushioned so he will be fine. TJ was super worried so he had me call my dr. They said he should be fine but wanted me to come in to check the heartbeat. Well all was good there. So I was told to ice and heat as needed and take ibuprofen or Tylenol as needed.

That evening I noticed Tommi's eyes were kinda gooey (like Mileys the week before) but I was hoping that was not going to turn into anything. Well that night Tommi ran a 101 fever and seemed yuck. So off to the drs Thursday morning!

She had to miss school which meant missing her field trip and valentines day party :( We went to the walk in hours at her drs office but they were so busy and only had afternoon appoints we ended up going to a med express place. She was not running a fever by this point but we still went in. They gave her eye drops for her eyes and tested her for the flu which came back negative so he said it was probably just a virus that was resolve itself.

She was begging to still go to my parents so we decided since it was not the flu that we could go. Well she felt pretty crappy the whole drive and that evening spiked a fever again ugh!

So we went to the dr down in VB on Friday morning and he pretty much said it was the flu based on Miley having it early in the week. She also had some fluid on her ear so he gave us antibiotics incase it started bothering her.

So Tamiflu for 5 days plus the eye drops for her eyes. That evening right before we were supposed to go to Chases to have dinner with him she spiked a 106 fever! Talk about panic! We were doing wet rags and everything to get it down! Thankfully it went down and never got back to that point.

Saturday and Sunday same thing with fever and feeling crappy. She did show improvement here and there but still feeling yucky.

Monday night she came to me at dinner and said "Don't touch my ear it hurts but I don't want to take medicine!" UGH! So off to CVS we went to fill the antibiotics. So now she is finished with eye drops but still taking Tamiflu till Tuesday night. But we now add antibiotics but thankfully only once a day!

We are now finished with Tuesday and still not fever free. She has gone all day with out a fever today until about dinner time and it spiked back to 102-103. Yay!

I'm keeping her at home so she can get better and not catch anything else...so basically I am stir crazy as is she! She had to miss school again today! Poor thing just wants to be back to normal.

Thankfully during the day she feels good so that is a huge plus!

I'm SUPER sore and am hoping it just got worse before it gets better but if only one of us is going to heal right now I want it to be Tommi!

Over 2 weeks of sickness in our house...I'm more than ready for nice weather to say the least!

This week...

I'm so ready for NORMAL!

So last Monday started with a runny nose from Miley...ok it is winter colds happen. Then we had the whole pink eye thing Tuesday into Wednesday. Well the antibiotics cleared that up by the next day but it was seriously SOOO sad to give her those drops she would cover her eyes and say "No mommy!" We did them faithfully for 3 days but I will be honest by Saturday once was enough and I was done!
Well Wednesday evening Tommi woke up throwing up after nap. But by bedtime she was just fine. Thursday Miley was ok. On and off seeming cruddy but overall seemed fine.
So Friday Miley had her 2 year appointment, her nose was still runny and she had a slight cough but again I figured it was a cold. At the appointment she had to have a finger prick and they had to work her poor finger to get all the blood for the iron and lead tests. Then she was ok for the dr but still not happy about her boo-boo so she was weepy but the dr said her cough was definitely just drainage. Then she had to get a shot. Yeah she was not happy about that one. So we went home and got everyone down for naps. She woke up from nap pretty clingy and seeming more off then normal but between being tired, being upset over the appointment, and the crud it wasn't weird. That evening we had a meeting with a new tax guy and right as we sat down Miley was walking over to me and hit her ear on the corner of his desk. Yeah not cool. Well we went to dinner afterwards at Chilis and she seemed hot to the touch. Well during dinner she clung to me a bunch then ended up falling asleep on me for majority of dinner. We got home and I took her temp and it was 102*. I gave her some Tylenol. She went over to TJ's recliner to kiss him goodnight and he picked her up and was cuddling with her when all he sudden we guess he leaned back too far and his chair flipped back. WHAT THE CRAP!?!? Poor guy hit his head and Miley started crying but was just totally worried about daddy. Needless to say she keeps saying "Daddy fall over" and is kinda scared of anyone sitting in the recliner now.
Saturday we woke up and Miley ok till after breakfast then she clung to me like a leech. Poor thing had a terrible cough that sounded really yuck. Went through the evening clinging to me and sounding horrible. She didn't have a fever all day till the evening then it hit again. So we did honey elixir and Tylenol. Sunday again she was cruddy and no fever till the evening. She seemed even worse in the evening than she did on Saturday night.
Thankfully during all this she was taking random snaps, napping very well, and sleeping well at night.
Sunday night she woke up calling for me but when I picked her up she still acted like she couldn't find me, calling for me and moving around like she couldn't get comfy. Finally she asked to get back in her bed and there she still kept just crying for me. So I went out thinking maybe I was bugging her. She stopped and I heard little except a few coughs through the night.
Today (Monday) she woke up still clingy and whiney so I decided to call the dr to see what was up. Needless to say after I called the dr she was not coughing much and seemed to be playing more. Of course! But I took her in anyway...she was good till we went back to the exam room and due to being there for the 3rd time in the last week she was scared. She did not have a fever. The dr came in and Miley was not happy but she let her listen to her lungs, check her ears, and mouth. All was clear. So she wanted to test for the flu. She went to do the nose swab and Miley lost control and threw her head around (with the swab still stuck) so we got it out and the dr was going out to run the test and I look down and Miley has a crazy nose bleed! Yay! ugh! The dr got me tissues and stuff and I cleaned her up. Poor thing was a mess for a while till I finally got her calm and got her dressed again. The dr came back after a bit and said it was Flu Type A. :(
Since the on set was more than 48 hours before she couldn't give her meds but she did suggest I called my OB to get Tamiflu to prevent getting it myself b/c if I got sick it would be ALOT worse being pregnant and all. She told me I need to push fluids and just keep her comfortable b/c it is just a crappy thing. Told me her cough and sneeze sprays a 6 foot radius so keep big sis away as much as possible. Yeah right! I will do my best but I am a stay at home mom and will not punish Tommi for Miley's sickness. So we will do our best to hand wash and wipe stuff down but prayer will hopefully keep Tommi healthy.
Miley woke up from nap rather spunky and being silly. Still needed me close but was MUCH more like my Miley. We had to go with TJ to take Tommi to ballet so I could run by Target to get my Tamiflu b/c they close at 7 and ballet is not over till 715. So we dropped them off at ballet, ran to target....yes I'm a bad mom and carried Miley in and picked up my meds and ran out, thankfully she never coughed so hopefully didn't spread anything. She actually kept her face buried in my neck. So it was a 5 minute trip. But  we got it and went back to ballet and hung out in the car till it was over. At which point Miley was starting to decline and act miserable again. By the time we got home she was feeling rather bad and just wanted me to hold her. Her fever was 101.8 so I tried to do Tylenol and for some reason my PERFECT medicine taking child did not want to take anything. I had to get it in b/c she needs the relief from the body aches more than anything. So I had to force it but I honestly will do what it takes b/c I want her better.
Got her ready for bed and she almost jumped into her crib she was SO excited to get in bed! Poor booger. I was able to figure out a way to elevate her head (she sleeps sideways in her bed on top her pillow)
2 hours later I have not heard any coughs...yay! I am praying harder than anything that we can make it through this SOON. We are supposed to go to mom and dads this weekend but if this fever is not gone for 24hours before I don't think it would be best to take her while still contagious and traveling that far while feeling as bad as she does would not be good. She lights up every time we mention going to Big mama and pappys and she has been looking forward to getting back down since Christmas so I really hope we can!!! I know it would be the PERFECT end to the sickness she has been through.

I'm worn out! From the worry and just the constant trying to make her comfortable and trying to avoid as much discomfort/distress for her. I'm ready for a break. BUT...my baby is not in the hospital and she is not fighting for her life! So we are going to get through this! God is good ALL THE TIME and will bring us all through!

IT'S A....

BOY!!! We have a wiener! haha As a sister of 2 brothers that just cracks me up to say! I mean seriously I have gotten so used to talking about girl parts, the word "wiener" and "balls" just makes me feel at home! haha I sound so dirty but this is my honesty.

I was going to be excited either way but this is so fun b/c it is a whole new world. And I can actually use new cloths and this child will not end up with everything as a hand me down.
So the ultrasound tech asked us if we were sure then told us "It's a boy!" Tommi was grinning from ear to ear! She said she was praying it would be a boy! So fun! Miley was with us too but she was watching Mickey the whole time haha Whatever we have to do to keep her quiet!

I still have my doubts b/c well I thought we only made girls and the pictures are not a perfect shot of a "twig and berries". But the tech seemed really sure and checked a few different times. I LOVED this ultrasound the best of all the ones I have had b/c the tech was so thorough and showed us all the chambers of the heart, His little lungs hiccupping, the kidneys, a few angles of the spine, the brain, the face, hands, feet, thigh bone, etc. It was really neat. He was all snuggled up to my placenta sleeping so he gave her no trouble with getting all the measurements she needed. They said he weights about 1lbs 2ozes (I think) so the 43% tile. The 2 angles she wanted and couldn't get were the bottom of the feet and the exact under shot of his boy parts. She only wanted those b/c they make good pictures. But she was super confident with saying it was a boy. Now I just have to convince myself haha

My thoughts are I just don't want everyone to spend money on stuff for "him" and we have another girl then we basically have everything. I do need another dresser and I want a different swing (takes up less room and runs off electric) no matter what we have. The swing is only a wish. But if it is for sure a boy we need clothes and boy blankets also. So not really that much just little things and then a couple bigger things that either we will fund or someone can gift but definitely not expected after this being baby #3! I think people are excited to actually have something to get us though since with Miley I really didn't need anything. Not that she didn't get new stuff just not what a boy will get.

Well I have been feeling really good. I can complain but hate to b/c I caused it haha I have a shooting pain in my inner right thigh that is TERRIBLE when I roll over in bed and when I get up. It feels like some one is sticking a huge needle into my inner thigh but again it is not constant so I am not that bad off. I have heartburn but it is not terrible. I would take every bit of pain I have and the heartburn over being sick and throwing up all 9 months. I do not know how people do it!

We got quite a few pictures...it was really exciting.

The boy parts...I guess haha

Another "it's a boy" picture. I do know the long white line is his thigh bone, then his knee on the left, his leg bends back and between the lower leg and thigh where the arrow is, is supposed to be boy parts.

Then my sweet SON's face! He was smiling during it and totally just chillin!

Here is the announcement!

 

The day itself was NOTHING like I planned but I think I am getting used to that. Miley woke up Tuesday morning with crusty yuck eyes but I thought it might be part of the cold she was seeming to get. Then by the evening they were pretty yucky and I was having to wipe them often. So we decided we would go to walk in hours on Wednesday morning. So I figured we would wake up and get out asap. Wrong again we did not get out till 830 so we got to the dr about 850. They took me back eventually and we waited a while. Finally at 940 I had to go out and ask if they could come in to see her b/c I had an appointment myself. I felt so bad but they did make her next on the list. So I didn't really get answers...she said it could be viral and antibiotics would not help, or it could be bacterial and antibiotics would help. So with out a culture they couldn't tell. But since I didn't have time they couldn't do one. But she did say even if it was viral it could turn into bacteria quickly so she gave me some drops to use for 5-7 days. Oh how fun to put in a 2 year old! haha
Well we obviously made it to my appointment...about 2 minutes late :( oops.

So in the announcement Miley looks all sickly and Tommi's hair...oh my sweet girl cracks me up that she wants those curls and they looked nappy that day! So we were a hot mess but it is all good!

 

So that day after going to target to get meds and let the girls pick out an outfit for their brother. We got home, neither girl wanted lunch. So we eventually did naptime, which thankfully went well. Until Tommi woke up throwing up! Ugh! She threw up a couple more times, mainly just water. Then she was better so that was interesting.

 

Woohoo! Just not like planned but we are all generally healthy now and good to go!

USA

I turned the TV on this evening and it was the opening ceremonies where all the countries walk out. Tommi asked what it was so I told her it was all the countries who are competing in the Olympics (then I had to explain the Olympics a little). She got wide eyed and said "Mommy can I stay up to see them walk out with the American flag!" Honestly I was SO ready for her to go to bed b/c she has been grumpy but I could not say no to that!

 It made me so happy! I want her to always be that proud of the country she lives in! It may be corrupt in so many ways but that doesn't change that we have freedom and that flag makes me proud of all the men and women who have given their lives to keep us safe!

So we put Miley down and snuggled and watched the people proudly wave our flag and about to kick some booty! :)

Baby frog

So we find out in 4 more days what this munchkin is!!!!! I'm SOOOO excited!!! I believe by far this is my wildest child in utero at this point. Everytime I sit down or am still this baby is flipping and kicking...it is crazy! I LOVE it so much though. I do know that the activity doesn't mean anything for the child b/c Miley was much less active than Tommi and that is not the case now!

I just get so excited to know the gender b/c I feel like I can bond so much more. Like the baby becomes "real" when it has a gender (and a name) We will keep the name part a secret again b/c that is seriously so much fun! I think those closest to me have speculation on names b/c I have mentioned them over the years but the final choice will not be known. Though my mother has known everytime haha. Well that at least goes for a boy. With a girl I have names I love but TJ has vetoed all of them so that will be a tough one to figure out if we have a 3rd girl. I feel like sibling names need to go together especially when it is the same sex so we have some major limits that go up if this is girl #3.

So woohoo! Wednesday morning we have our appointment and both of the girls are going with us...eek not sure how that is gonna go. I will have my phone totally charged in case we have to break out the Mickey to keep Miley entertained!

After the appt the plan (I think) is to blow up either pink or blue balloons for each girl and if they want we will make a video to tell the family or just do a picture depending on the mood. Then after all family knows I will let the world know...so lets hope our family responds quickly so I can announce it to the world!

sleep

So the past 2 nights (Saturday and Sunday night) Tommi has slept through the night!!

Sunday morning she got up at 6:50 so I told her if she went back to bed for 10 minutes she could still get her sticker for the night haha She went back down for 40 minutes until Miley woke up! Yay!

Sundaynight/Monday morning she got up and came in my room at midnight and I walked her back to bed and she let me leave almost immediately with no whining. So I called it success since I had not actually fallen asleep yet.

At night when we put her down she is still making us come in every 10 minutes or so to "check on her" silly but if it means no tears and no fears I will do it!

I have never been so thankful to have my girly back (somewhat) I mean that crying and shaking stuff scares me! 

Sleep update...

Monday night...
we put TJ's sweatshirt (that he wears often) in her bed with her b/c we heard the smell could possibly make her feel more comfortable. We got her in bed and comfy pretty easy but had to come in and check on her every 10 minutes till FINALLY she fell asleep (after about a hour). Then she slept until 3:15am and she called for me...she didn't cry so that was good. But I cuddled for a bit till she was asleep then I moved...which is not graceful...and she woke up and got teary eyed so I stayed but sat on her bed and she was in and out of sleep. Anytime I tried to leave she got weepy and "shivering" as she calls it. But basically she starts shaking. So after some convincing and telling her she only had a short while till she could get up, she let me leave. So I got back in my bed at around 4am. I have a hard time falling back to sleep after that b/c I am so sad for her. So she slept till 7am when she came to bed with me. Since TJ was gone she just crawled in his side and we "slept" till 8am when Miley woke up.
So over all it was not that bad. I just wish the tears and sadness were not involved.

Tonight...
We didn't get to bed till late so she was super tired. But we had to check on her twice in 10 minute-ish increments again so that was a huge victory! I am praying she sleeps till the morning!!

We made her a chart on Sunday...if she sleeps through the night with no calling and no tears, she gets a sticker. So far we have no stickers but she wants one really bad! So hopefully we will get there. If she gets 7 stickers she gets a prize...she picked a Slurpee as her prize :)

Mommy needs her sleep and to not have to move anymore times than necessary during the night. I just get stiff and have hip and inner thigh pain so it is a bit dramatic to move!

On another note...I'm 20 weeks this week! This baby is a kicker and a shifter when I sit still! It is so fun!!! 2 weeks from tomorrow we have our ultrasound! I have never been so anxious to know the sex and see this munchkin again! I love my little froggie SOO much!! woohoo!

School...

It just hit me like a ton of bricks today that Tommi will start school in August! I have always felt I was so ready but now I'm not so sure. Our life is so "easy" right now with no real schedule! She has preschool 2 days a week but it doesn't start till 9, is 10 minutes away, and Miley is old enough her mornings are more predictable!

I'm going to have a 2 month old and we will have to leave in the mornings at like 7:30! Hopefully I can get Tommi up and fed and ready before the baby and Miley get up but I doubt that! I'd love to just get them up and throw them in the car and go but we all know how predictable newborns are! I'm just scared the baby will wake up and want to eat when I need to be leaving etc. To prevent that I would have to wake the baby and feed him/her at a reasonable time but again babies are so not predictable.

I want to drive Tommi to school in the beginning. I want to be there for the first week or so to get her to class etc. Then after that my MIL can take over taking her. At that point I can get her up and ready and send her with TJ up to his parents house and she can ride with her from there. But the thought of sending her with out me is REALLY hard to imagine! I feel like I would be letting her down!

I want to cry b/c I'm that not ready in my mind. But then again I'm NOT homeschooling b/c that would not be fair to her to not get the attention she needs b/c I have 2 others to tend to and not have the friends that she would at school.

I'm now questioning my timing of this little munchkin BUT God planned it so of course it will work out!
Again...praying for a Lukey baby that will just go with the flow b/c life is gonna be crazy!!!

A phase?

Well the past 2 nights Tommi has given us some major trouble when putting her to bed. She does everything great then when it comes time for us to walk out the door she can't contain her tears. She literally just cries like she is scared of something but can't tell us what is going on.

Last night I was so frustrated that I did not handle it very well. I basically got mad at her...in the matter of about 30 minutes, she got her nightlights taken way, I got very frustrated, and it was a horrible situation! TJ being the calmer parent in frustrating times was super concerned b/c she was shaking and really upset. In my mind I kept thinking she is just trying to manipulate us. So TJ went in and cuddled with her for 45 minutes or so. He finally came out and I went in and told her I loved her prayed over her and gave her back her nightlights b/c it was too dark with out them and I felt like crap by that point. She needed me and all I could do was get mad b/c she was taking away from my time to chill. Seriously Laura? Mom of the year moment for you...NOT! So she finally did go to sleep after that.

I hardly slept b/c I felt so bad. I prayed and prayed God would just give me the patients to help her like I would if it were during the day and not cutting into my selfish time. And honestly begged for forgiveness b/c I was struggling.

Well tonight went well to start and I thought ok it was a fluke. But nope...the moment I went to walk out the door she pulled out the "I have to pee" so I said no and walked out. Well she came out and was crying on the toilet for some random reason of "she felt like she had to pee and she could only go a little" I started to feel frustrated but didn't go there. So I went in and laid down with her for a while. I went to get up and she just couldn't not cry and kept telling me she wasn't cold but she said she was shivering (she was not actually shivering that I could feel) So I laid with her again and prayed over her (to myself) over and over and thanked God for my issue b/c that means my baby is at home and needing me. Not in a hospital or somewhere I can't control things. I felt peace. She asked TJ to come in for extra kisses then told him to ask me to come do "extra prayers". So I went in and prayed with her and laid with her more then I needed to shower so I told her I was going to do that and I would be back ASAP. She got teary eyed but we talked and I got her all kinds of stuffed animals and offered her 2 stickers that she really wanted. (Weird but whatever works) She seemed to calm and was ok with this. I went out and TJ was in the basement so I had to wait about 20 minutes. Since she didn't call for me I went in before my shower and let her know I had to wait on TJ so I was going to shower now. She told me "I was just praying to God" so I asked her what she was praying about thinking she was praying to be brave etc. She said "I was praying for a baby brother!" and giggled. Lord help me that stinker. I pray she is not disappointed either way! Well anyway I gave her her stickers b/c I was proud of her. She seemed happy. I told her I would be right back. So I took a shower and probably was gone 30 minutes. When I went back in she was sleeping peacefully! So it was an hour process again but 110 times better than yesterday. TJ is super worried about her but I'm thinking she is going through a phase. I have had that "funny feeling to cry" too many times to count and vividly remember my mom comforting me when I felt that way. She never made me feel ashamed and I want Tommi to have that confidence also.

If she needs me then that is where I am going to be! Thankfully Miley goes right down now so no worries of her!

I am SO thankful for peace tonight and patience! I felt like a new person after getting through that tonight with only a few tears. No shaking, no crazy can't breath crying, etc. We did well! I will be moving bedtime back a bit to account for the time she needs to settle but she can't tell time so she will never know!

I needed to document this...it is hard to admit those "bad mom" moments but it happens and I am working hard to be patient and find peace. I want to be the mother God wants me to be. I want to always be there for my kids and be the best for them.

Weird...

Tonight Tommi was throwing fits over everything and hurt herself twice (jammed her finger and stepped on a toy) in the process of getting mad about something.

So the last one happened when TJ hit her in the leg with a ball on accident...she started crying like he broke her leg and just couldn't calm down. So I sent her to her room to calm down...after she walked out Miley crossed her arms and said very matter of fact "Weird...Tommi is weird" hahaha TJ and I about died it was so funny!

For the record she did calm down and we got our girl back with only minutes to spare before bedtime!

Slacker

I was reading back through my blog I kept with Tommi and poor Miley gets jipped I wish I blogged more about the little things b/c I know I will have and forgotten the silly little things she says etc. That goes for this baby too though...I was pretty on top on things with Tommi and Mileys pregnancies but this time I have only taken a couple pictures and never write much about how I'm feeling.

So I am going to work harder on documenting about everyday things. That even goes for Tommi at this point. She is getting so smart and says hilarious things and I want to remember them!

Miley and Tommi are both currently loving the song "Wagon Wheel". Tommi can sing most of the chorus but Miley's version is "rock me momma, rock me momma" with a random "wagon wheel" in there! It is hilarious!

Tonight Miley's favorite thing to tell me was "Momma, listen" she said it over and over as I looked at her listening. We were in church so that was interesting but that is Miley now! She talks ALL THE TIME! Which is so funny b/c majority of it is just repeating whatever Tommi is saying or whatever she hears on TV!

Today is Miley's 2nd birthday!!! We had a party yesterday that was just both sets of grandparents, one set of great-grandparents (Nana and Pap-pap) and Nate. We just had pizza and cake but it was nice to celebrate her and her crazy personality shined through b/c she was with (most) of the favorite people. She got LOTS of Minnie stuff, money and we gave her a dvd player for the car.
Tommi has a new fascination with calendars and dates. She would always ask me when she had school or when her birthday was, etc. So I bought her a calendar and put school and important dates on it. So she marks it off the day before bed and tell us what the next day is number wise and if there is anything going on. Tonight she told us "tomorrow is the 20th, then the next day is the 20th one" haha She knows all her number but I guess that threw her off. She knew how to say 22nd and 23rd. She can count to 100+ by herself now...and can go further but usually wears down after 105. That is a lot of numbers!

This pregnancy is going well. I am feeling the pains much earlier than the last 2 times. My hips and tailbone remind me often how much they dislike me! haha But over all I'm trying to enjoy it b/c it is flying by! The thought of this being the last time I'm pregnant makes me sad but 99% sure I do not want anymore children after this! I want to give my kids as much as I can. Even 3 spreads things thinner but I am confident this is exactly where God wants me! If Tommi's excitement doesn't seal that I don't know what does! She tells everyone how excited she is and asks me daily "how big is the baby?" It is awesome! She was some what aware with Miley but this time she really understands! I'm praying for a "Lukey baby" aka a baby with my little brothers personality, super laid back!

I have had a few drs appts. My last one was on Thursday and everything is going well. Baby's heartbeat was 151/152! So neat! No news is good news on this one. We set up our big ultrasound for February 12th and plan to take both the girls (that should be interesting) I debated if I wanted to find out the sex this time b/c it would be a fun surprise but I want to know to I can plan clothes etc. and plus Tommi is so ready to know she could jump out of her skin...that actually goes for everyone! As long as I come out knowing I have a healthy growing munchkin I will be on cloud 9!

I am not feeling much movement but my midwife said that could be placement of my placenta but not sure. I have been feeling flutters for a while but the major kicks "flicks" are not happening yet. That is one thing I can not wait for!!

So that is life about now. My girls are on a wake up early kick. They are getting up at 7-730 yuck! I want 8-830!

Almost 2

Miley has come to life even more in the last couple months. She is talking up a storm and even more full of herself then before. She will repeat anything we say and actually talks rather well. She has really started communicating very well. I love it! She loves to tell everything "love you ____!" She is still insanely obsessed with her big sister and wants to do everything she does...including the super annoying stuff!

I seriously fall more in love with her daily. She sleeps like a champ going down between 8-9 and waking up around 8ish. She has to have her baby, monkey "George" and her "night night" to go to sleep but otherwise she totally loves her bed.

She has become a super snugglier wanting to sit in the crook of my arm on the couch and just chill. I love it b/c I am usually surrounded by my girls since Tommi has always been my cuddler.

She still does not get the whole baby in my belly thing. She thinks Tommi is the only big sister and she always says no if someone talks about a baby in my belly!

For a month or so she would call Tommi "Nommi" but just in the past couple days has started saying it more clearly Tommi. Which excites Tommi so much.

I can not believe she is turning 2 but it is also awesome b/c she is really becoming a little girl...but still such a baby too!

Tonight I went out to eat with just the girls and Miley refused the highchair which for tonight is fine but most times I need her in it! She did do very well sitting in the booth with me but still can't sit still for more than a couple seconds at a time.

Still Miss Personality and wild woman but she is a blast!

She is really getting into learning her colors...she is right an awful lot that it makes me think she knows but then she will be totally off. So who knows but the interest is there so that is good.

Still a peanut but I'm thinking she may have broken the 20 pound mark...maybe. On our scale she is 21 lbs but not sure if that is right. She has her appointment on the 21st so I will know for sure.

I still do not know how all her personality and craziness fits into her tiny body!