Tuesday, April 8, 2014

Little family...ramble

This evening we went to the ball field so TJ could hit and the girls could play. It was an adventure to say the least...but not so bad. Other than Miley falling in mud! But thankfully it was Miley b/c Tommi would have freaked. Miley fussed until she saw TJ had a towel to clean off her muddy arm then she was fine...muddy but fine.

Anyway...after 3 or 4 trips to the outfield with the girls so they could help collect balls with the guys I decided I wasn't going to keep walking out there. If the girls wanted to go they could but I was parking my fat butt on the bench.
Well as the girls chased TJ yelling "Daddy wait for us!" or Miley's version "Daddy stop...please! I coming!" then he stopped and waited and Miley's sweet voice saying "Thank you daddy...hold hand please" I couldn't help but just smile watching them in their little slice of heaven hanging out with their daddy and running free like a child should! I know how blessed I am but sometimes it just takes my breath away. I am a bit bias but I seriously have the 2 best girls around! (I even say this after a tough afternoon with Tommi and her wanna be 15 year old attitude) They love with all they have and forgive and forget how we all should. Miley could have pouted (like I would have) about her crazy messy leggings and being a bit chilly b/c they were wet but no she ran out to do it all again just to be with her daddy. Tommi could have kept a chip on her shoulder b/c she got in trouble at dinner for being a poop head, no she forgot and moved on.

At one point TJ said "I love you Tommi." she smiled and said "I love you too daddy" and one of the guys said "That won't last forever...she will not always feel that way" or something along those lines and I couldn't help but think...yes she will! She will ALWAYS love her daddy! She may not always like him but she will always love him! He may make her mad, frustrate her, etc but she will always think he is superman! After 28 years my daddy is still my hero and always will be. He has loved me so deep that he has made me mad and frustrated me but think of all the pain and frustration I have put him through and he loves me more than I understand. Even as a mother I know I will love my girls till my last breath and beyond but that love still amazes me. Love that deep can only be felt, never explained.

I just am taken back that they are really my kids! I mean I know I gave birth to them and have raised them for almost every second of their life but I still sometimes can't help but feel like I'm watching someone elses life, a life I dream of having. Not perfect but perfect all in the same breath.

Time goes by so fast and sometimes I just need to stop and catch up to it b/c I do not want to miss a thing. Pregnancy has brought on some really bad attitude days for me. I almost wake up counting the minutes till bedtime but I need to stop and remember these girls don't deserve my bad mood. They need their mommy to love them and be patient with them. Plus they are watching me and feeding off me. I need to be positive and enjoy life as they do!
Don't get my wrong I KNOW I am blessed but human nature and stupid hormones mess me up sometimes! I just thank God for blessing me with this life b/c I don't deserve even a fraction of what I am given!

Another thing that is really cool is to watch the young guys TJ plays ball with and watch them look at him with his family and desire that. He is a good example to them and I love that he can be. No he is not able to go hang out with the guys as much as them and has to always "ask his old lady" before doing things. But he has SO much more. Being a single guy who can do as he pleases will only get you so far but that love of a family and somewhere to "belong" when everything else is gone.

In true Laura fashion I get overly emotional and ramble but I am just amazed at my own life.

As my son tries to bust his way out of my belly via my belly button I can't help but just smile b/c being pregnant is such a miracle!!!

Monday, April 7, 2014

Growing up

It is crazy at times how grown up Miley is getting...well both my girls but Miley has really grown up recently!

She is SOOO expressive when she talks and uses her hands all the time! It is adorable!

So the other night we had a church dinner and Miley wanted some of my drink. She was holding the cup and looked at me and said "What is it mommy?" Sounds so little but it made me laugh so hard b/c she seriously formed a full sentence and also the fact she thought through that. It was so cute. So I told her it was lemonade and she took a sip and said "I yike it mommy!" then when she handed it back she said "Thank you mommy for a sip of lemonade" WHAT?! She has always said thank you but just recently has started telling us what she is thanking us for. With her cute little voice everything she says is so adorable!
This morning I yawned and Miley said "Tired mommy?" as she shrugged her shoulders and I told her I was. She said "Go to bed momma!" Oh I wish I could but it is so not that easy my sweet girl!

I wish I could bottle her up! She is a pistol but good gracious does she have my heart!!!